bengaluru,....only kannada audhu

I was in Bangalore the other day for a land registration formality. Though it ought to have been a serious affair, it turned out to be really funny. For starters, unlike what everyone assumes, english is not a language that people are familiar with in bengaluru. Nor are they familiar with hindi, and tamil is like anathema for them thanks to the Cauvery situation. To make the situation worse, the above mentioned languages are the only ones that my mom, my uncle who accompanied us for the registration, and i knew. We had to go through our agent to get all the forms filled ad the deed signed, and as luck would have it our agent was a kannadika, in short he spoke only kannada.

My uncle and i tried our level best to communicate with him in all the languages we knew, and also with the aid of drawings in the air, but to no effect. For everything that we said the answer or reply was the same, "audhu" meaning yes, irrespective of whether they understood us or we understood them. Finally after much difficulty, the formalities were almost over and all we had to do was sign the papers at all the required spaces. But how is one to know which are the required spaces if he's to see the myriad of forms for the 1st time. So again we had to trust the agent, who pointed us to many different spaces to put down our signature and that is when i realised even he did not know the exact spaces. He had even asked us to sign at the Sub-registrar's column. I was lucky enough to notice it and avoid putting my mark there. Finally after 2hours of charade, we finally belled the procedures and came back home.

It was only later that i came to know about the plight of many non-kannada speaking people who had to confront with audhu at all the unlikely places. Besides i also came to know that on asking directions to any place, the standard well versed answer would be straighto, dead endo, righto (go straight and take right on reaching dead end), irrespective of where the real place is.

All i can say is may god save all those souls which take refuge in Bengaluru,.....long live kannada,....